Moving Forward

December 1, 2006 at 12:00 am | In love and relationships | 14 Comments

So I bought my very first Christmas tree that belongs to just me. Since I moved out of my mom’s house, I haven’t had a proper Christmas tree. I had a dinky 24″ fiber optic one that I made my ex come with me to get before we lived together so there would be SOME holiday spirit in his apartment (remember that, Scrooge McDuck?). It stayed with me after we split and went up for my first Christmas all alone. Here you can see it atop my entertainment center, with the Venice Beach boardwalk just beyond the blinds.

IMG_0445

But that tree really only made me sad anymore. Still, it didn’t feel right to get my own…like there’s something missing, or something I haven’t figured out yet…because I’m on my own. Then I thought, who knows how long it might be that way? Life is going on, whether I think it’s wierd or not. Christmas comes and goes. Am I going to miss something because it’s not what I imagined it would be? That’s ridiculous. So I bought the tree to spite the part of myself that thinks people who live alone don’t get to have their own tree. Fuck you, self-loathing Helena!

It was still a little sad to trim because starting your own traditions outside of your family home when you aren’t part of some other unit gives you kind of growing pains. Things are changing, I’m getting older. This isn’t my mom’s tree. It’s not the little tree I shared with someone who isn’t in my life anymore. This is my tree, just for me. It’s not much, but it’s a start.

My First Christmas Tree!!

14 Comments

  1. Well I think it’s lovely! And if some guy does come along he’s not going to be thinking ‘Oh, I’m not happy about this, it should be a shared tree’. He’ll be like ‘Don’t have to worry about the tree thing, she has it covered. Sweet.’ Then he can just concentrate on showering you with gifts and whatnot. Everyone wins!

    Comment by J — December 1, 2006 #

  2. Well I think it’s lovely! And if some guy does come along he’s not going to be thinking ‘Oh, I’m not happy about this, it should be a shared tree’. He’ll be like ‘Don’t have to worry about the tree thing, she has it covered. Sweet.’ Then he can just concentrate on showering you with gifts and whatnot. Everyone wins!

    Comment by J — December 1, 2006 #

  3. I LOVE your little tree. You know the best part, though? You didn’t have to fight over the ornaments or how to put them on, or where to put the tree in the first place. Just one question: where’s the popcorn on a string?

    Comment by Jen Neil — December 1, 2006 #

  4. I LOVE your little tree. You know the best part, though? You didn’t have to fight over the ornaments or how to put them on, or where to put the tree in the first place. Just one question: where’s the popcorn on a string?

    Comment by Jen Neil — December 1, 2006 #

  5. J, You have no idea how lovely that sounds! Get on a plane already ;)

    Jen, you’ll never believe it! I popped the popcorn and put it in a bowl to string that night, then I didn’t get around to it. So now this bowl of popcorn is sitting in my fridge, next to my very expired eggs :) Thanks for reminding me! Thanks for loving my tree, too.

    Comment by Helena — December 1, 2006 #

  6. J, You have no idea how lovely that sounds! Get on a plane already ;)

    Jen, you’ll never believe it! I popped the popcorn and put it in a bowl to string that night, then I didn’t get around to it. So now this bowl of popcorn is sitting in my fridge, next to my very expired eggs :) Thanks for reminding me! Thanks for loving my tree, too.

    Comment by Helena — December 1, 2006 #

  7. To quote a favorite song lyric… “it’s beautiful and so are you”. Have a wonderful Christmas, dear!

    Comment by Spender — December 1, 2006 #

  8. I cant wait to put some stuff under there.

    Comment by Tarous — December 1, 2006 #

  9. Pretty. :)

    Comment by Jenn — December 1, 2006 #

  10. A Christmas tree? What are you, meshugina?

    Actually, my knee-jerk reaction on seeing the photo of the tree was, “I have no idea why anyone would use up valuable floor space like that.” But then again, I live a very cluttered existence.

    Comment by Albert — December 2, 2006 #

  11. A Christmas tree? What are you, meshugina?

    Actually, my knee-jerk reaction on seeing the photo of the tree was, “I have no idea why anyone would use up valuable floor space like that.” But then again, I live a very cluttered existence.

    Comment by Albert — December 2, 2006 #

  12. Now you just need one for your Mac as well…

    http://www.jschilling.net/sw_xmastree.php
    :)

    Comment by J — December 2, 2006 #

  13. Now you just need one for your Mac as well…

    http://www.jschilling.net/sw_xmastree.php
    :)

    Comment by J — December 2, 2006 #

  14. Now you just need one for your Mac as well…

    http://www.jschilling.net/sw_xmastree.php
    :)

    Comment by J — December 2, 2006 #


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